Is there anything more badass than collecting body parts from your slain enemies while going bat-shit crazy in a grocery store? Answer: No. Granted, this was not actually Dolph, but Sgt. Andrew Scott in Universal Soldier. But look in those eyes. That is the look of a man who KNOWS what it is to have an ear necklace. Yes, he is one of the greatest thespians of our time, but some things you just can't fake. As an avid collector of other people's teeth, I can appreciate this. If I want to take down Chuck, I need an ear necklace.
Now, by the time I finished this masterpiece, the grocery store was closed. So, I went with the next best thing: my open refrigerator. But fear not, this is officially my new errand ensemble.
And with that, Dolph Lundgren week comes to a close. I feel like I've learned a lot and am well on my way to defeating Chuck Norris. Next week (tomorrow) I'll be back with a brand new badass to emulate.
Great. Now I'll never be able to have another satisfying sexual experience without picturing you above me in your ear necklace threatening my life. Fuck.
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